The Lift (2)

While drinking tea and biting the poğaça in my hand, I heard approaching footsteps again. I stood up and tried to see who was walking. First a young girl with red shoes passed. They were high heel shoes and the red was so vivid that even I felt jealous as if I all I needed was a pair of shoes in this dark, forgotten corner of the universe. This must be Şule, the young girl whose fiancé has thrown the ring a few weeks ago, withdrawing from the expected marriage in this summer. It seems she is compensating her heart’s loss with the gain of sparkling shoes. She was wearing pink shoes yesterday and a purple pair on Monday. Then a boy with sneakers ran quickly. This must be the office boy who does all the chores of the office. Copy this paper, take these documents to the factory, distribute the letters to the desks, keep the folders on the shelves, take the model drawings to the chief... He does everything from A to Z so that his profession has no name.

Silence conquered the corridor for a while after the sneakers disappeared. I watched the white lights coming from the ceiling, tried to figure out what the others are doing in the office and waited for someone to notice me. A pair of shining Gucci shoes appeared right in front of my eyes. These were the shoes I knew very well, these were the shoes the entire office knew very well. “Fahriye, what are you doing there? ” I thought it was a joke, a kind of joke only bosses have right to make. “I am taking my annual leave, Tufan Bey. I am tired of the pristine beaches of Mediterranean sea and the cloudy mountains of Black sea so this time I am going to enjoy my vacation here.” His feet moved a few inches back, seemed preparing to attack, definitely not laughing at my joke. “Fahriye, I know you are bored there. I have some new drawings on my desk. Can you look at them and let me know if they are suitable for the new collection?” I first thought he was teasing me but his feet seemed very adamant like a castle ready to defend. I stared at his feet to make sure what he says is what he means. “Tufan Bey, here is so dark. Let’s wait for the technician. Once he saves me from this cage, I can do my job in the office.” Gucci shoes get closer to each other, making the gap between them narrower as if they don’t want anything passes through. “I will bring a torch for you. It will be enough. You know we need you so it is better if you don’t waste your time.”

About 10 minutes later, Ahmet’s shoes appear again. “Fahriye Abla, I could not find the torch. Here there are four candles and a match. Can you work with candle light?” I didn’t answer because I knew my “no” would not make any difference. “Give them to me. I hope I can lit the candles and at the same time I can survive this box.” Ahmet lifted one of his feet to scratch his other leg and ran away. “Abla, I will bring you one more tea. Don’t feel lonely there. Tea is the best cure for loneliness.” I took the candles, put them at the four corners of the floor and lit them. The flickering light filled the room and my shadow became scarier. I stopped moving and waited for the papers to arrive. Perhaps, Ahmet was right. Tea could be the best cure for the loneliness but it may not be enough. However, I am not lonely. I am not even alone. I am just trapped in a lift a few meters away from most of my friends in the entire world.

Gucci shoes came back while I was playing with my shadow. He leaned down and showed his face through the gap. “Fahriye, I brought the model drawings but one is missing. Anyway, do your best. Is the light enough here? Can you breathe well?” I knew none of his questions expects answer from me so I said no words. He gave me a glass of tea first and then showed me his clean-shaved face. The papers emerged next to his smiling eyes, showing his good mood, expecting me to be the same. “Thank you, Tufan Bey, I need the missing drawing too. I also need the catalogue of the colours. Ask Şule to bring them to me. Also some a pencil and an eraser. She must have the other drawing on her desk. I gave it to her yesterday for final checking. ” Tufan Bey’s face enlightened as if thousands of candles are lit right at the tip of his nose. “Ok, ok, no worries… Şule is coming.” His face vanished, back of his feet appeared and they moved away quickly.

In the light of the candles, I looked at the model drawings, compared them with each other, made some minor changes and tried to stop my mind travelling to the various questions of life. Time was already approaching to 10 and still there was no sign of the technician. I was in the lift for almost 2 hours and I felt like I was here for days. I sat between two candles, made some drawings on the back of the papers. Right after I finished a new skirt model, Şule’s red shoes came, broken hearted Şule’s broken hearted shoes were still crying in her trembling voice. “Ablaaaaa, Hikmet Bey called from Alpha Garment. He wanted to talk to you. He said it is very important, he will call again.” She was speaking like someone was chasing her, short sentences with sharp ends... I stood up and stared at her shoes closely. They were a counterfeit brand but they were very good ones, hard to differentiate. I said to myself when people cannot reach a life, they find the ways to reach the shadow of that life and most of us live a fake life, a life which is imitation of others' lives, a life which seems worthed to live more than living our own.

I raised my voice to her as I am her senior in the office. “Şule, don’t you see where I am! How can I talk to him when I am trapped in this hole? Tell him wait till i get out of here!” Her feet moved back a few centimetres and she crouched to the ground, showing me her carelessly ironed red skirt . “Don’t worry abla, I brought the phone here and will put it at the corner of the door. He will call in 5 minutes again. Please answer it!” I saw my desk phone at the corner, its buttons were reflecting the light coming from the ceiling, its blue cover made me feel as if I was in the office, looking at the pictures of my children right behind the phone. It surprised me that the cables were long enough to reach from my desk to the lift. Perhaps, I felt a bit frustrated. This place was turning into my office minute by minute. Next, they will try to bring my computer here but I don’t think my huge screen can pass through this small gap. Then a portable chair and a small desk! I said nothing, turned my face towards the candles, looked at their dancing light reflections on the walls of the lift and kept waiting for the call.

To be continued…

Turkish words

Abla: elder sister (commonly used by younger ones to address middle-aged ladies)

Bayram: Religious or national festivities

Peynirli poğaça: a pastry with cheese filling

Bey: Mr