Grabbing the Pain

If suffering is freedom

we were both free

She is a homeless scrub bird

I am a caged canary

She flied from branch to branch

scattered her heart around

I split my heart

to the rebellious verses

If reunion is freedom

we were both free

Her hands were screaming

              two worlds side by side

We were both from two mountains

               like two tempestuous streams

                             flowing down. 

We had met at a crossroads

We had forgotten being apart

We had forgotten missing

             we were lost in our song

Happiness was a blue child

             playing in our garden

Love was actually to seek, I understood

Love was actually to miss, I realized

It is to find, to find again and to lose

a dreamy toy.

They were lies, all lies

There was such a thing called love once upon a time

There was no such thing called love once upon a time

What remained after the pain

were those stares only.

The swans in my eyes

              were actually the clouds of a sunset

They were lies, all lies

I wish I was scattered 

              towards different trajectories.

I suffered for many days.

I suffered silently.

In that short life as a guest,

In the chaos of an earthquake,

I lived several thousands years

by grabbing the pain.

If suffering is freedom

               We were both free.

Hasan Hüseyin KORKMAZGİL

Translation: Ali Rıza Arıcan

*********************************************************

ACILARA TUTUNMAK

 acı çekmek özgürlükse

       özgürdük ikimiz de

o yuvasız çalıkuşu

        bense kafeste kanarya

o dolaşmış daldan dala

            savurmuş yüreğini

ben bölmüşüm yüreğimi

       başkaldıran dizelere

kavuşmak özgürlükse

       özgürdük ikimizde

elleri çığlık çığlık

           yanyana iki dünya

ikimiz iki dağdan

iki hırçın su gibi

            akıp gelmiştik

buluşmuştuk bir kavşakta

unutmuştuk ayrılığı

yok saymıştık özlemeyi

        şarkımıza dalmıştık

mutluluk mavi çocuk

       oynardı bahçemizde

aramakmış oysa sevmek

özlemekmiş oysa sevmek

bulup bulup yitirmekmiş

          düşsel bir oyuncağı

yalanmış hepsi yalan

sevmek diye birşey vardı

      sevmek diye birşey yokmuş

acılardan artakalan

           işte bu bakışlarmış

kuğu diye gözlerimde

       gün batımı bulutlarmış

yalanmış hepsi yalan

savrulup gitmek varmış

       ayrı yörüngelerde 

acı çektim günlerce

acı çektim susarak

şu kısacık konuklukta

deprem kargaşasında

yaşadım birkaç bin yıl

      acılara tutunarak

acı çekmek özgürlükse

          özgürdük ikimizde

 Hasan Hüseyin KORKMAZGİL